Monday, February 27, 2017


It was a hot summer day when I met him on the construction site next to my parents’ house. Under the sweat and dirt, Manning Sutter was as handsome as the sun was bright. He was older, darker, experienced. I wore a smiley-face t-shirt and had never even been kissed. Yet we saw something in each other that would link us in ways that couldn’t be matter how hard we tried.

I loved Manning before I knew the meaning of the word. I was too young, he said. I would wait. Through all the carefully-chosen words hiding what we knew to be true, through his struggle to keep me innocent, and through infinitely-starry nights—I would wait. But I’d learn that life isn’t always fair. That no matter how much you achieve, none of it matters if you suffer the heartbreak that comes with falling for someone you can never have. Because even though I saw Manning first, that didn’t matter. My older sister saw him next.

Jessica Hawkins writes the angst, the forbidden and the swoon worthy like no one else. I will admit, the heroine is 16, and I had reservations...but this is Jessica Hawkins, and there was no way she was going to write a book that was bad (she is just not capable of writing a bad book) so I dove in. And....


I am going to need a minute to recover. I was up too late reading, I was crying, I was tortured, I FELT for the main characters, I hated the secondary characters (including one I think I was supposed to feel a little sorry for, oops) and I yelled at my Kindle when the book ended because I WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT. Yes, this deserves shouty caps. (Read it, and come back and tell me you agree, you will.)

Lake and Manning. She is 16 (trust me, you get over that quickly) and for obvious reasons, a relationship with an older man is a bad idea. But there is a friendship, and an attraction there that sets up one of the best slow burn relationships in the history of the slow burn. Seriously, this book is like a "how-to" of making the slow burn relationship work.

As always, the writing is perfect, the pacing moves quickly enough that you feel the tension of the main characters, but it is not overwhelming...until the cliffhanger ending when you will cry, scream and beg for more.

And, we get more. In MAY...because Jessica Hawkins knows how to leave you wanting more, May seems like a really long time from now.

I recommend this book, I would give it more than 5 stars if that were possible.

There are some people who can wait until an entire series is out to start it so they don't have to wait in between books...but I've never been one of those people. I also should mention that I'm usually one who shies away from angsty type books-but if Jessica Hawkins wrote it? I'm reading it.

From the moment I started reading I was hooked. I will admit that I instantly connected to Lake in a very personal way. I'm the baby in my family, the bookworm with an older sister that I simultaneously adored and couldn't stand. I grew up in the 90's so many things in this book just hit home for me.

The push/pull between all of these characters was amazing. You feel that burst of attraction, that girl finally feeling what it might be like to be a woman-with an older man. A man who doesn't want to want her. Doesn't want to have feelings other than protectiveness-even though he does. I felt like I was on a ferris wheel watching them below (read it, you'll get me) and my heart fell from the car when it was at the very top. I never picked it up again; reading the rest of the book just made my heart feel like it was walked over and crushed a million times.

Don't get me going on the secondary characters. I know they're there for a purpose. I understand their purpose...I think. But I don't like them (I'm looking at you, Tiffany).

When I finished this book I swear my finger kept trying to swipe the pages on my kindle, as if more would magically appear. But it didn't happen. This book was worth the heartache, the tears I shed. If I could give it more than five stars I would. I absolutely recommend this book.


Jessica Hawkins grew up between the purple mountains and under the endless sun of Palm Springs, California. She studied international business at Arizona State University and has also lived in Costa Rica and New York City. To her, the most intriguing fiction is forbidden, and that's what you'll find in her stories. Currently, she resides wherever her head lands, which is often the unexpected (but warm) keyboard of her trusty MacBook.

Author Links


Sign up for her Mailing List!